Category Satire

President Obama Exchanges 5 US World Cup Soccer Players with Ghanaian Witch Doctor for Cristiano Ronaldo

WASHINGTON, DC – In a hastily arranged Rose Garden ceremony, US President Barrack Obama announced a break-through deal with the Republic of Ghana.  The President stood with witch doctor Nana Kwaku Bonsam, whose name translates as ‘Devil of Wednesday,’ while announcing the exchange of five US World Cup players for Portuguese soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo’s […]

THE LAST FRIENDSTER

PASADENA, CA:  Eighty-eight year-old Mildred Stone, grandmother of seven, posted two complaints this morning.  There was a sticky, disgusting substance on the Post Office counter where she had to sign a form to pick up the mail for her neighbor, off visiting relatives in Toledo.  Her second rant regarded the line at Dunkin Donuts: too […]

What Makes You Searchable

He knows everything, and I mean everything, about you—your drunk Instagram pics, how you falsely claim to hate One Direction, that is, if iTunes’ “What Makes You Beautiful” download records are accurate—and Steve Jobs would demand no less, which you’d know, since you bought the authorized biography from Amazon–, how you burnt 80% of your […]

NSA Snooping Impacts The Presidential Election

His smile, a simile of sincerity, exploded as the webcast cameras’ ‘on’ lights turned red. “Good evening, America, I’m Gus Garcia, Chief Washington Correspondent, CNN News. Welcome to Atlanta, Georgia, America’s third largest city, home of the Peachtree Center and tonight’s 2024 Presidential Debate.” His brown eyes, circles of wisdom, blinked under graying temples, whitish […]

I Will Fix Your Trillion Dollar Coin Problem

I volunteer! There’s a controversy between comedian Jon Stewart and New York Times columnist Paul Krugman.  Hot-headed Krugman and the funny Daily Show host went back and forth about a proposed trillion-dollar coin minted from platinum. [1]  The US Government has a wee bit of trouble making ends meet these days.  One way of dealing with the Debt Ceiling issue, Krugman […]

Land of Blago Conquers youTube with Squeezy The Pension Python

 When Rod Blagojevich was impeached, we lost a good friend.   A f-ing golden ally.  Stand-up comics lost a steady paycheck.   The Chicago dailies lost the last reason anyone bought their newsprint.  And the Democrats lost an election.  Ha, that last statement is impossible here in Illinois. Blago was replaced by Lt. Governor Pat Quinn.  Though he’s not […]

EL BLOOMBITO – CHAPTER ONE

¡Help write El Bloombito!  As an interactive exercise, I started typing two hours ago.  I have an idea where it’s going, but you, the reader, will help push the story on in “Mad Libs” style.  This of this as an “Improv” of writing.  Be fun!  Be crazy!  Be original!  Please read on. EL BLOOMBITO – CHAPTER ONE […]